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Criticizing and Advising

【Encouragement】I saw them tearing a building down,

A gang of men in a dusty town.

With a “yo heave ho” and lusty yell,

They swung a beam and the side wall fell.

I asked the foreman if these men were as skilled.

As the men he’d hire, if he were to build.

He laughed and said, “Oh, no indeed.

Common labor is all I need.”

For those men can wreck in a day or two,

What builders had taken years to do.

I asked myself as I sent my way,

Which kind of role am I to play?

Am I the builder who builds with care,

Measuring life by the rule and square?

Or am I the wrecker who walks the town,

Content with the role of tearing down?

【Encouragement】Encouragement is like a peanut butter sandwich—the more you spread it around, the better things stick together.

【Encouragement】Said Bear Bryant, one of the greatest college football coaches ever, when he was pushed to explain his philosophy of coaching: “There’s just three things I ever say to my players: ‘If anything goes bad, then I did it. If anything goes semi-good, then we did it. If anything goes real good, then you did it.’ That’s all it takes to get people to win football games for you. I can do that better than anybody.”

【Encouragement】In a 1978 interview, Low Holtz, at the time the head coach of the then number-one rated Arkansas Razorbacks, modeled and stated his philosophy of coaching. At practice, Holtz grabs his players by their face masks and shakes them; he flails at them with his hat; he throws his hat in disgust; he smacks players on the rear with his omnipresent manila folder. “Once you get things going, then you begin to build confidence.” He says. “You praise loudly and criticize softly.”

【Encouragement】Dr. Paul Tournier received the supreme compliment of life on day when an acquaintance came to visit him in his home. The acquaintance relayed a message from a third party, who had never met Dr. Tournier but had been helped through many of his writings. The message was: “You’ve going to see Paul Tournier in Switzerland. No doubt I shall never see him in this world, but tell him from me that he will be one of the first people I shall look out for in heaven.”

【Comfort】Merrill Womach, a brilliant Christian singer, was in a plane that struck a tree after takeoff in the winter of 1961. The plane caught fire and Womach tumbled out of the plane engulfed in flames. Some people found him and drove him to a hospital. On the way, to their amazement—from a body squealing with pain—came these words:

I’ve found the dear Savior and I’m made whole,

I’m pardoned and have my release.

His spirit abiding and blessing my soul,

Praise God in my heart there is peace.

Wonderful peace, wonderful peace.

When I think how he brought me from darkness to light,

There’s a wonderful, wonderful peace.

【Comfort】A little girl lost a playmate in death and one day reported to her family that she had gone to comfort the sorrowing mother. “What did you say?” asked her parents. “Nothing,” she replied. “I just climbed up on her lap and cried with her.”

【Comfort】The Joe Bayly family, in the course of several years, lost three of their children. In his book “View from A Heatse”, Joe Bayly shared his honest feelings when one of his children died.

“I was sitting there torn by grief. Someone came and talked of God’s dealings, of why it happened, of hope beyond the grave. He talked constantly. He said things I knew were true. I was unmoved, except to wish he’d go away. He finally did.

“Another came and sat beside me. He didn’t talk. He didn’t ask me leading questions. He just sat beside me for an hour and more, listened when I said something, answered briefly, prayed simply, and left. I was moved. I was comforted. I hated to see him go.”

【Criticism】Horse Sense:

A horse can’t pull while kicking,

This fact we merely mention,

And he can’t kick while pulling,

Which is our chief contention.

Let us imitate the good horse,

And lead a life that’s fitting;

Just pull an honest load, and then

There will be no time for kicking.

【Criticism】Adventuresome and courageous pioneers have often faced the critical laughter of jealous observers.

The first American steamboat took thirty-two hours to go from New York to Albany. People laughed.

The horse and buggy passed the early motor car as if it were standing still (it usually was). People laughed.

The first electric light bulb was so dim that people had to use a gas lamp to see it. They laughed.

The first airplane came down fifty-nine seconds after it left the ground. People laughed.

If you try to tackle a big job, or if you have new ideas, expect criticism!

【Criticism】The story is told of an old man whose grandson rode a donkey while they were traveling from one city to another. The man heard some people say, “Would you look at that old man suffering on his feet while that strong young boy is totally capable of walking.”

So then the old man rode the donkey while the boy walked. And he heard some people say, “Would you look at that, a healthy man making the poor young boy suffer. Can you believe it?”

So the man and the boy both rode the donkey, and they heard some people say, “Would you look at those heavy brutes making that poor donkey suffer.” So they both got off and walked, until they heard some people say, “Would you look at the waste—a perfectly good donkey not being used.”

Finally, the scene shifts and we see the boy walking and the old man carrying the donkey. No matter what you do, someone will always criticize it.

【Criticism】The Critic:

A little seed lay on the ground,

And soon began to sprout.

“Now, which of all the flowers around,”

It mused, “shall I come out?

The lily’s face is fair and proud,

But just a trifle cold;

The rose, I think, is rather loud,

And then, its fashion’s old.

The violet is all very well,

But not a flower I’d choose;

Nor yet the Canterbury bell—

I never cared for blues,”

And so it criticized each flower,

This supercilious seed,

Until it woke one summer morn,

And found itself—a weed.

【Criticism】The following is attributed to Theodore Roosevelt:

“It’s not the critic who counts, not the one who points out how the strong man stumbles or how the doer of deeds might have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred with sweat and dust and blood; who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”

【Criticism】A man was applying for the job of private secretary to Winston Churchill. Before introducing him, an aunt of Churchill’s told the man, “Remember, you will see all of Winston’s faults in the first five hours. It will take you a lifetime to discover his virtues.”

【Ignoring Criticism】Sailors in the northern oceans have frequently observed icebergs traveling in one direction in spite of strong winds blowing in the opposite direction. The icebergs were moving against the winds, but how? The explanation is that the icebergs, with eight-ninths of their bulk under the water surface, were caught in the grip of strong currents that moved them in a certain direction, no matter which way the winds raged.

In the Christian life, no matter how strongly the winds of passing opinion blow in opposition, the believer who has a depth of living in the currents of God’s grace should move toward righteousness.

【Judging】Most of us are umpires at heart; we like to call balls and strikes on somebody else.

【Judging】Judge not.

The workings of the mind and heart

Thou canst not see.

What looks to thy dim eyes as stain

In God’s pure light may only be a scar,

Bought from some well-won field

Where thou wouldst only faint and yield.

【Judging】A lady in an airport bought a book to read and a package of cookies to eat while she waited for her plane. After she had taken her seat in the terminal and gotten engrossed in her book, she noticed that the man one seat away from her was fumbling to open the package of cookies on the seat between them. She was so chocked that a stranger would eat her cookies that she didn’t really know what to do, so she just reached over and took one of the cookies and ate it. The man didn’t say anything but soon reached over and took another. Well, the woman wasn’t going to let him eat them all, so she took another, too. When they were down to one cookies, the man reached over, broke the cookie in half, and got up and left. The lady couldn’t believe the man’s nerve, but soon the announcement came to board the plane.

Once the woman was aboard, still angry at the man’s audacity and puzzling over the incident, she reached into her purse for a tissue. It suddenly dawned on her that she really shouldn’t judge people too harshly-for there in her purse lay her still-unopened package of cookies.

【Advice】A wise man seeks much counsel… a fool listens to all of it. ―― Larry Burkett.

【Advice】A man was on the practice golf course when the club pro brought another man out for a lesson. The pro watched the fellow swing several times and started making suggestions for improvement, but each time the pupil interrupted with his own version of what was wrong and how to correct it. After a few minutes of this interference, the pro began nodding his head in agreement. At the end of the lesson, the student paid the pro, congratulated him on his expertise as a teacher, and left in an obviously pleased frame of mind.

The observer was so astonished by the performance that he asked, “Why did you go along with him?” “Son,” the old pro said with a grin, as he carefully pocketed his fee, “I learned long ago that it’s a waste of time to sell answers to a man who wants to buy echoes.”