Back to Home Page | Back to Index
|
Listening
【Listening】The story has been told of a new commander who was
sent to an army fort on the American frontier. He soon was involved in a
conference with an important Indian chief. Working through a translator, he
nervously asked the chief a number of questions and was surprised to get no
reply. After the meeting, he asked the translator why he had gotten no
response. The translator replied, “That’s what we call Indian time. He has
enough respect for your questions to go away and think about them before
answering them.”
Maybe
we all need to practice more Indian time.
【Listening】His thoughts were slow,
His
words were few and never formed to glisten.
But
he was a joy to all his friends,
You
should have heard him listen!
【Listening】Listening is not just passive hearing. It is an
active participating experience in which you pay genuine attention to what the
other person is saying. Here are some principles that should help you become a
better listener:
1.Don’t
grab the conversation: “Yes, now take me, for instance…”
2.Don’t
let your gaze wander from the other person’s face except momentarily.
3.Validate
the feelings of the other: “yes, I see what you mean.”
4.Don’t
interrupt.
5.Don’t
try to top the other person’s story or joke.
6.Don’t
criticize.
7.Ask
appropriate questions: “What happened then?” or “How did you feel?”
8.Don’t
argue.
These
guidelines are cited by Cecil C. Osborne, in The Art of Getting Along with
People.—